Some days can be more difficult than others
Difficult in regards to stress , finances , depression and responsibility
Perhaps the stress of finacial and responsibility is the cause of the depression
I believe i manage reasonably well , but too i think i sometimes kid myself and dont manage well at all
I stress if i cannot help a dingo requireing help but then i stress if a person needs help
I stress due to feeling i have failed . failure to create the enviroment those in my care require .
I stress if unable to give each one the attention they so richly deserve .
I stress and panic when we are short of food or unable to keep up with vet costs
I stress when we cant pay our mortgage,
Without a home the dingoes have no home
I stress when my car is in trouble , with out a car i have no transport to help or acquire the care one may need
I stress because dingoes inside need to be out side . I then stress because when i manage to put them outside ( during rotation because of insufficient pens ) they stress because of not feeling secure in unfamiliar area or seperation anxiety
I then stress when attempting to find the right home ..so many things race through ones mind
Will he she be happy will he she be treated
right
Realizing that one on one has to be beneficial and being loved as one in preference to be loved as one of many .
This resposibility is a burden. I fear for the individual in my care, he may be loved as one of many but he is safe secure and loved. Does percentage count ?
But too i then feel if he or she is in their forever home having found that right home loved and protected then I am able to give another a second chance
However stress depression and I appear to be life time companions
In saying all that ( perhaps making little or no sense and perhaps inferring I am loosing the ability to actually make sense )
There is a reason to this story,
I have been extremely anxious ( and theres that word again )stressed .
I do attempt to hide and not show , due to the sensitively of our dingo
He becomes an extention of our thoughts and stress rolls off like a cloak one of which he too wears .
Nowra has been here since she was all of 5 weeks old . she is now 15 months
A force to recon with is Nowra .
To coexist with our wild dingo , rules apply ( their rules )
Request and not demand
Please and thank you
Conversation against domination
One must not question their intelligence and respect is of the utmost importance
Back to stress..making it difficult to cope with nocturnal dingo behaviour when one is depleted of patience
One is prone to get cross . now to get cross reaps its own justice , the dingo will mirror your behaviour becoming more unruly more difficult due to reading the anger and anxiety, you, in this case, ” me ” displays
Needless to say it is hours of disruption dingo arguing and retaliation , with all of the following .
you hatez me . you angry wiv me, i doesn’t likes you, i gona tear up da house and rip ya chair and climb the walls
Hmm you doubt my story? ( welcome to come stay for a few days )
Due to the chaos and chaotic behaviour stress levels rise
By now she is yelling at me and me at her, its a bitch fight
The reason .. She is mirroring my thoughts my energy my angst
However Monday night one of my wildies being Nowra pushed many buttons and i am now very angry , storming around telling her ive had enough and smartly be told” izz hafs enuff ”
Dont worry about ruffling feathers the dingo fur is now ruffled
I went to bed ..
Tuesday im stressed because of being stressed .
Now i dont cry having learned and being taught to with hold emotion
However i broke the golden rule and due to Stress sat here with a coffee watching Nowra tear around , demanding my attention , yep i cried ..just like that
And dont ya hate it when that happens ( just makes things worse
From the day nowra arrived i would kiss her ears her eyes her nose, its a ritual, one as she has become older she sort of resents , izz notz a pup any more , attitude
So i sit I drink coffee and i cry , miss Nowra jumps up on the bench , stares at me , puts her head against my forehead licks my tears
And kisses me on the mouth. Yep a smackaroo on the lips both paws on my shoulders .we just hugged it out
So you see we get what we give . dogs dingoes all animals become an extention of ourselves
And to quick are we to undermine their intelligence empathy and understanding
Well now wasnt sure if i would post this
Ahh what the hell , its a stress relief thingy .
